Kristen Chaffee

"I want to die. And it isnt a result of my illness. I hate this place and the loud, ghetto people yapping on the phone and screaming about government aid. Theres a Steelers fan hobo who looks for wives"

"Wear sneaks so you can easily hoist yourself out the porthole on the upper deck and catch a glimpse of the citi building lights twinkling in the Manhattan skyline. Bask in the East River breezes."

"Uj makes a great g and t"

"Congratulations on the mayorship"

"I have to close my eyes when I reach in the bin for an onion because of the swarm/plague of bugs that comes at my face. Wash and refrigerate everything unless you want a fly infestation"

"If Gpa joe is here, expect to be watching cowboy and indian movies 24/7"