Dan Stofka

"The $99 dollar whitening plan is the way to go!"

"If you attempt to take a paper airplane decoration, you will be asked to leave."

"Mexico brought a dragon to fight the horse of death. Don't look directly in its eyes."

"If you're an irresponsible parent this bar not only allows them, apparently by the turnout they welcome them. Remember, nothing teaches a child morals and ethics like a sea of drunk people."

"The pitchers are horribly dirty. Do not order anything in a pitcher. They have clearly not been replaced in 10 years."

"Don't order the orange juice. It is the worst in Colorado. For a place that serves breakfast all day they should be ashamed."