Jason Martin

"Make sure you ask them to tessellate your cheese. As if handling your bun wasn't enough. . ."

"THE BEST THICKSHAKES. Ask for extra thick!"

"The kebabs here almost rival those from Kebab Queen in Albany Creek. Almost. (Just needs cucumber!)"

"Avoid the upright exercise bike closest to the PT desk. The gas-lift bike seat is like a see-saw."

"Toilets close at 19:30 for the travellers with a weak bladder."

"Oh look, fatties unite."